A Beginners Guide to: Spanking You!

Self Spanking Hints, Tips and Tricks

This help page has been provoked by the numbers of visitors arriving at this website, having entered "self-spanking" (or similar) into a search engine. The numbers demonstrate that many people feel the urge to self spank, even though it is something that is not often confessed to. As with all these things, I will begin by making it very clear that this advice is from limited personal experience, and the experience of others.

Self-spanking is not for everyone, some people find that without the compulsion derived from a partner determined to tan their rear, the purely physical simply hurts. But while it is probably second best to a real spanking, sometimes a stinging and throbbing bum is exactly what is needed, regardless of how it arrives. A vivid imagination is a tremendous asset.

I am not about to tell you that this is necessarily the "right" way, or the "only" way. However, I hope that this page helps a few people through their first experimental self applied spankings. And the Forum has a section dedicated to self-spanking enthusiasts who are always ready to help and discuss things.


First, some general advice. Spanking is a noisy business! It is strongly recommended that you save your session until you can be sure that you have the place to yourself, and that you are unlikely to be interrupted. I suggest you take your time to think about what you are going to do, partly to help with the physical preparation of location, clothing, equipment etc, but most importantly to prepare your mind. Then when the time is right, go for it whole-heartedly.


Couples generally have a dominant who decides on the punishment, but many singles find it difficult to set a punishment for themselves. Here are some tips to assist:

  • Decide what you are to be punished for, and assign a fixed 'sentence' which could be made up of a number of separate punishments.
  • Write your assigned punishment down so that it is more difficult to renege on, but in the early days don't push yourself too far.
  • The punishment components could include your mode of clothing (pyjamas or a special 'naughty outfit'), 'corner-time' (or some other similar style of punishment that you find humiliating and therefore erotic), 'chores' (which could include writing 'lines' or an 'essay'), various types of spanking, and various positions.
  • Devising and noting down the details of your self spanking will probably get you 'in the mood', and may help you get past feeling silly, which is often an obstacle when experimenting with self-spanking.
  • Be strict with yourself, you are about to be punished, and commit yourself completely.

If you are still struggling to assign your own punishments, there are a number of programs around on the Internet that might assist, including 'Random Punishment Selector' from 'animeotk.com'. Also there is a downloadable EZCP file which works quite well, available via the link below:


NB Once unzipped, files include a 'punishment book' where previously assigned punishments are saved for repeat offences etc. EZCP.PBK. Some anti-virus programmes complain about this .PBK file and think it is an address book for use by virus programmes. These warnings can be safely ignored.

Hand-Spanking Technique

This is where self-spanking has to diverge from the traditional spanking position. You will find that when bending over fully (either standing, kneeling, or bending over furniture) your arms simply are not long enough to deliver a satisfactory smack to your bum. In practice, you need to arch your back in the opposite direction, at least a little. This allows your arms to reach lower, and therefore you can 'get at' the lower half of your bottom, which is where the most satisfying sensations are to be found. It follows then, that a standing or kneeling upright position will probably be most suitable. The viable alternative is to lay down, leaning on one arm and twisting your upper body through ninety degrees to allow the free arm room to move freely.

Here is where the self-spanker gains a huge advantage. You get to feel at first-hand what your spanks feel like, and you can adjust your method until you feel it is right for you. All the normal hand spanking methods apply, firm flat palm, cupped palm, fingers only, spread fingers. And pretty much all areas of your bottom, thighs, and areas in between are open for chastisement. And primarily for the really daring girl, laying spread-legged on your back makes inner thighs and pussy accessible.

It is probably better to deal with your left cheek by using your left hand, and your right side with your right hand. Everyone is different, and you will develop your own personalised technique over time. Why not write in and let us add your favourite method to this page, many other readers will be most appreciative!


The use of some form of tool or implement makes things both easier, and more complicated. The extra foot or so of length allows for you to reach your bottom better, however, it is possible to 'mis-hit' and cause yourself undesirable pain. Once you establish your toy of choice, you can 'reserve' it for your own secret purpose. If it is an ordinary everyday item, it can be 'hidden in plain sight' without arousing anyone else's suspicions.

Self Caning (also applies to a Crop)

Caning oneself is one of the more effective methods of applying some intense sting to your own rear. Any short 'stick' can be put to good use, and unlike a proper disciplinary cane, it can be rigid so common garden canes or plant stakes can be used. 18 inches to 2 feet in length is ideal. But the technique required is not immediately obvious. The obvious grip will restrict you to downward pointing diagonal strokes across your bottom, not good. Your cane should be held so that, in the standard grip, its length protrudes out of the back of your hand, instead of protruding forwards like a sword (the horse-riders among you will know this from holding a riding crop). With this grip, when the arm hangs loosely at your side, a quarter twist of your wrist will lay your cane's length horizontally across both cheeks. The cane is held in the fingers rather than the fist, and is applied with a flicky twist of your wrist and fingers, with only a slight swing of your arm. Experiment with light taps, concentrating on getting even and level contact across both cheeks. When held between fingers tips and thumb, the little finger can supply quite a rapid flick to the stroke. It takes practice, but in time you should be able to deliver yourself quite a stripey rump.


Many common household tools make excellent chastisory implements. The stiff and flat variety are easy to handle and provide as much sting as you would wish for. Wooden spoons, spatulas, hairbrushes, bathbrushes - your kitchen and bathroom are full of items that will give a wide range of sensations from sharp and stinging to deep and thuddy. The longer items can be applied using the technique described above in the self caning section, or by twisting around and swinging with a standard grip.


An often used tool by the self spanker, and it has the advantage of being an erotic spanking implement for many people. Plenty of sting and flexibility, but you need to be careful as the flexibility can lead to off-target strokes. It can either be doubled twice and used more or less as a paddle, or it can be used by swinging your arm across the front of your body and allowing the strap/belt to wrap around behind you. A right-handed person would hold the belt in their right hand as expected, but instead of twisting around to the right, swing the right arm across in front of you and allow the length of the belt to wrap around your left hip while the tail end builds up speed as its length reduces. This technique, with practice, can deliver a sharp crack to either cheek. With a fairly short strap it is possible to swing it between your legs and upwards, reaching those very sensitive areas of the buttocks.

Electrical Flex

Although we have no personal experience, this implement has been mentioned by self spankers more than a few times. The idea is that a length of heavy duty round section flex (such as typically comes fitted to extension leads) is doubled or quadrupled and applied as per a strap. Apparently it is very effective indeed!

Hints and Tips from Other People

This topic has been aired on the Forum, and listed below are some of the ideas provided by members:

From Dominique: I spank myself with espadrilles or sneakers which are made of canvas and rubber sole (rubber and not plastic). The sole has to be clean (disinfected with wipes). It is very effective, be careful yet!

From Jesse: To self spank you need heavier implements, different ones than you would ever want used on you by someone else. A heavy bath brush with an extra long handle. An extension cord. Yes I know, that sounds terrible, but over clothes at first, it delivers a lovely thud, not sting. And when real connoisseurs get together, they like to discuss whether thud or sting or a combination is better. I'm a thud person. LOL. You fold it in four, and hold both ends in your hand. Have fun.

From Marina: I spank myself quite often, usually when I'm forced by evil circumstances to go without. Hand-spanking myself just never worked for me. I always felt silly trying to do that. I have plenty of toys that work great for that purpose, though: a hairbrush, a pretty wicked two-tailed short rubber whip, various smaller paddles, a tawse, a leather paddle/tawse combination (for those days when you just can't make up your mind), even a child-sized leather belt that works great for self-spanking when doubled up. The bristle side of the hairbrush always creates that lovely day-after burn, you don't even have to smack hard and the feeling is similar to a sunburn. I get pretty creative sometimes with positions, too - being flexible helps.

From SubEditor: It could just be that self-spanking isn't necessarily a poor substitute for someone else doing it to you. As masturbation is to intercourse, so is self-spanking to spanking? Not necessarily inferior, just different, with all pleasure focussed on the individual doing it.

From KTfromMT: I have never actually tried self spanking, but I have thought of some interesting positions. One is called the diaper position. Where you are laying on your back on a bed or floor and have your legs up in the air. Another is a modification of this one. If you can't hold your legs in the air for that long you could use a chair or the wall even to rest your feet on.

From Firmhand39: In my earlier years I found that a belt, with me prone, over a chair, gave a nice zing.

From Vitch: I often spank myself. The way I do it is i lie face down, and spank myself with a wooden cane which is probably about 2 and 1/2 feet long, I also use a piece of board as a sort of paddle. I have 2 such makeshift paddles, one of them is probably a little more than a foot long, the other is a bit longer than that. The smaller one is maybe 4 inches wide, the bigger one is probably about 5 or 6 inches wide. I spank myself with my hand somtimes, but it doesn't hurt very much, it's usually hard to spank yourself with much force. A position that can work better is if you bend over a bed, so that your torso is lying on the bed, but your legs dangle off of it, and your feet (and possibly your knees) will be on the floor. In this position, you may be able to have better aim. This is important, as striking the lower back instead of the buttocks can result in spinal and kidney injury (though I don't think either of those are very common). Another good way to spank yourself is to stand with one hand on one of your knees, and then spank yourself using a paddle or a similar implement with your other hand. You can often spank harder this way, and it often gives you better aim.

If you have any questions or comments on the content of this page, or suggestions on how this page can be improved, please feel free to write in using the Contact Saxon form.